Thoughts on "what gun do I buy for my wife/significant other ???"

**Jay** · 10-31-2009, 06:22 AM

Thoughts about……..”What firearm should I buy for my wife/significant other… OR FOR ME??”

I regularly post to buy a firearm like you buy shoes. I use that analogy because everyone’s feet are different, re shoes…. as are their hands different, re firearms. I happen to like Merrell shoes, but I’m not about to suggest that everyone looking for shoes go buy Merrell shoes. Everyone has to decide for themselves how a particular shoe fits. I know generally what kind of shoes my wife likes, but I’d not stretch that knowledge so far as to guess at what handgun is comfortable for her hands. There are some here who say it doesn’t matter how a gun feels in your hands, that you can learn to shoot anything. Perhaps that’s true, but over the years, I’ve seen that not to be true with the majority of new shooters. A good shooter, can usually do well with an “uncomfortable” firearm, but new shooters tend to do better with one that “feels right” in their hands. Besides, if you buy a pair of shoes for someone, and they don’t like the fit, you can usually return ‘em. Firearms don’t normally work that way. If you guess wrong, you’ll usually lose money on the re-sale, or trade-in. I think we would do well not to use a physical description ( “my wife is a tiny thing and couldn’t handle a large caliber…..”) as a basis for suggesting which firearm someone else should buy for their wife/girl friend. Many folks here got irate when a gun shop owner suggested that a 1911 was too much gun for a woman…… yet those same folks here rush to suggest a “wheel gun for a lady”, or “she’ll love the light weight of this airweight.” Probably 60% of the ladies I’ve taught to shoot, and keep a firearm in their home, have chosen a 1911 variant. The key point here is, THEY CHOSE IT, after shooting it…. And they’re very happy with it. There are trade-offs to any handgun purchase….. less weight = more perceived recoil….. longer barrel = longer sight radius = potentially better accuracy….. more weight = less perceived recoil = more weight to carry….. and on, and on, and on….. Many of those trade-offs are important to some, and unimportant to others, but it’s not my place to assume who those trade-offs apply to. Touchy point…… I don’t believe that caliber is all that important to a new shooter. Too much caliber, too soon, may scare a new shooter away. I teach basics with .22 LR firearms. If a shooter’s given choice of technique allows them to place their shots on their selected target, proper technique will lend itself to effective recoil management, and allow the proficient use of virtually any caliber.

Sure, it’s nice to be able to shoot a particular firearm before you buy it, but not always possible. Many times, however, it is possible to handle many firearms and be able to get some idea whether or not one likes the way a given firearm feels in their hands, and I think that’s the best way to start. I’ve offered many times on INGO to let folks shoot what firearms I have, and have access to….in order to enable them to make a more enlightened choice when it’s time to lay down the money. Everyone who has taken me up on my offer has benefited from the outing, and has either solidified their choice, or they’ve changed their minds and chosen a different firearm. I’d like to see all of us make a similar offer to all new shooters. It would bring our shooting community closer together, and tend to retain shooters by helping them to be pleased with their first purchase.
Just my two cents, as always…..thanks for the opportunity to shoot my mouth off.

**twmccloskey** · 10-31-2009, 07:59 AM

When I met wife 2.0 she had a small Smith in 45 ACP. I think Smith makes great wheel guns but I do not like or trust their self loaders. Another story for another time, flame off please Smith &Wesson fans.

Our first Valentines Day, I gave her a Witness Carry Pro in 40 S&W. It is a delightful pistol. I then spent a number of our dates weeding out bad habits and putting her through the Marshal's hand gun course. She shots better than I do now, the ungrateful thing!

The grip angle and a lot of other things seemed to work for her. She is about 5'5" tall and long legged. Ask your wife what a size 6-8 looks like. It is very important that a pistol fits. I cannot shoot a pistol or revolver that is not comfortable.

The fit helps with recoil and accuracy. She has since bought herself a Snubby model 60. I gave her the FBI loads for it. 158 grain hollow point 38 specials. A Colt "New Agent" in 45 ACP, I like this carry gun. She shoots them all well, and carries everyday.

I tend to think I cannot comb your hair or put your hat on to please you, I am sure I cannot pick out your pistol, except the carry pro it was a natural. I bought one for my daughter 5' 0" she also shot it well, she was very proud of her ability to shoot. I miss her. I kept a 45ACP version for myself.

Tom

**Old John** · 10-31-2009, 08:55 AM

And my DSW has picked out and bought each for herself. I just ask her which store she wants a "gift certificate" for.
She has never bought any hand gun smaller than a 9mm.
She has her own 12 gauges too. And, a CC-permit.
Her D-O-Dad was a retired, career Marine. She could shoot just fine when I met her.

**lookingforthewayback** · 10-31-2009, 12:06 PM

I learned a long time ago the majority of my taste is in my mouth. I quit trying to buy things for other people until they had an opportunity to try it themselves. A carry gun is very personal, if it doesn't fit or feel right it will stay home, if it hurts to shoot it won't get practiced with. In Maryland I had a dealer who has an indoor range and allows customers to try out many of the guns or gun types he has in stock.
I will let anyone interested in buying a firearm try any I have to see if it is what they want.

**Chuck Langenderfer** · 10-31-2009, 01:37 PM

Buy her whatever she picks out and hopefully has a chance to shoot.

You dont buy her anything as a 'surprise'-guns that is.

**Popeye** · 10-31-2009, 05:35 PM

Buying a gun for a woman is like buying shoes for a woman. Even if its "right", its "wrong"!

**XD45** · 11-01-2009, 10:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Popeye

Buying a gun for a woman is like buying shoes for a woman. Even if its "right", its "wrong"!

I beg to differ! She loves the S&W mod 65-5 I bought her, it's just like the one she used to carry for Uncle Sugar. You just gotta do your research! She likes her 1908 .25 Hammerless too, it's 'so cute'! I'll take your word on the shoes, I'm not that brave.....

**threefeathers** · 11-01-2009, 06:16 PM

I have learned never to preselect a firearm for a woman. I'm surprised all the time.

**Nes** · 11-01-2009, 06:27 PM

My Wife likes most all revolvers. She does like my Ruger 22 semi. Her favorites are a 38 special snub and her 617 with a long barrel.

**Popeye** · 11-01-2009, 06:34 PM

Leedi likes 1911s.

**Urzandowski** · 11-01-2009, 10:04 PM

You have got to let her pick out the gun. I bought a revolver for my Wife. She likes revolvers. So over the course of several months I took her around to every gun shop/store in town, to let her see as many different makes and models of revolvers as possible. The number one thing about this process is that you have got to remember is to keep your mouth shut! Trust Me

Just take note on which model got the best reaction each time. For my Wife it was the Ruger SP101, 357mag. w/a Hogue rubber grip.

Popeye said... Buying a gun for a woman is like buying shoes for a woman. Even if its "right", its "wrong"!
You Sir!, are abslouetly correct there!
I got tha, "It's nice having my own gun, but its soooooo wrong" I think women are like that, but I'm still not sure.

**Williamlayton** · 11-03-2009, 03:01 PM

HUMMMMM---depends on the day. Some days I would buy the Hen a .500 and the first round would be C-4.

Most days I don't want her with a loaded gun.

On the best of days I am playing golf.

She gave me a gift cirtificate for my birthday---it was for a headstone and had to be used within 30 days.

Blessings

**gunfan** · 11-03-2009, 10:53 PM

Shelley is a revolver woman. When I bought her the Titan pistol, I made a "lucky strike"... She LIKED it! This was a rare occasion!

Scott

10-31-2009, 06:22 AM	#1
Jay Join Date: July 14 2004 Location: Central Indiana Posts: 943	Thoughts on "what gun do I buy for my wife/significant other ???" Thoughts about……..”What firearm should I buy for my wife/significant other… OR FOR ME??” I regularly post to buy a firearm like you buy shoes. I use that analogy because everyone’s feet are different, re shoes…. as are their hands different, re firearms. I happen to like Merrell shoes, but I’m not about to suggest that everyone looking for shoes go buy Merrell shoes. Everyone has to decide for themselves how a particular shoe fits. I know generally what kind of shoes my wife likes, but I’d not stretch that knowledge so far as to guess at what handgun is comfortable for her hands. There are some here who say it doesn’t matter how a gun feels in your hands, that you can learn to shoot anything. Perhaps that’s true, but over the years, I’ve seen that not to be true with the majority of new shooters. A good shooter, can usually do well with an “uncomfortable” firearm, but new shooters tend to do better with one that “feels right” in their hands. Besides, if you buy a pair of shoes for someone, and they don’t like the fit, you can usually return ‘em. Firearms don’t normally work that way. If you guess wrong, you’ll usually lose money on the re-sale, or trade-in. I think we would do well not to use a physical description ( “my wife is a tiny thing and couldn’t handle a large caliber…..”) as a basis for suggesting which firearm someone else should buy for their wife/girl friend. Many folks here got irate when a gun shop owner suggested that a 1911 was too much gun for a woman…… yet those same folks here rush to suggest a “wheel gun for a lady”, or “she’ll love the light weight of this airweight.” Probably 60% of the ladies I’ve taught to shoot, and keep a firearm in their home, have chosen a 1911 variant. The key point here is, THEY CHOSE IT, after shooting it…. And they’re very happy with it. There are trade-offs to any handgun purchase….. less weight = more perceived recoil….. longer barrel = longer sight radius = potentially better accuracy….. more weight = less perceived recoil = more weight to carry….. and on, and on, and on….. Many of those trade-offs are important to some, and unimportant to others, but it’s not my place to assume who those trade-offs apply to. Touchy point…… I don’t believe that caliber is all that important to a new shooter. Too much caliber, too soon, may scare a new shooter away. I teach basics with .22 LR firearms. If a shooter’s given choice of technique allows them to place their shots on their selected target, proper technique will lend itself to effective recoil management, and allow the proficient use of virtually any caliber. Sure, it’s nice to be able to shoot a particular firearm before you buy it, but not always possible. Many times, however, it is possible to handle many firearms and be able to get some idea whether or not one likes the way a given firearm feels in their hands, and I think that’s the best way to start. I’ve offered many times on INGO to let folks shoot what firearms I have, and have access to….in order to enable them to make a more enlightened choice when it’s time to lay down the money. Everyone who has taken me up on my offer has benefited from the outing, and has either solidified their choice, or they’ve changed their minds and chosen a different firearm. I’d like to see all of us make a similar offer to all new shooters. It would bring our shooting community closer together, and tend to retain shooters by helping them to be pleased with their first purchase. Just my two cents, as always…..thanks for the opportunity to shoot my mouth off. "For those who fought for it, freedom has a flavor the protected cannot taste." "USMC 8652, 2531, RVN Jun '66, - May 68"

10-31-2009, 07:59 AM	#2
twmccloskey Join Date: December 30 2008 Posts: 372	When I met wife 2.0 she had a small Smith in 45 ACP. I think Smith makes great wheel guns but I do not like or trust their self loaders. Another story for another time, flame off please Smith &Wesson fans. Our first Valentines Day, I gave her a Witness Carry Pro in 40 S&W. It is a delightful pistol. I then spent a number of our dates weeding out bad habits and putting her through the Marshal's hand gun course. She shots better than I do now, the ungrateful thing! The grip angle and a lot of other things seemed to work for her. She is about 5'5" tall and long legged. Ask your wife what a size 6-8 looks like. It is very important that a pistol fits. I cannot shoot a pistol or revolver that is not comfortable. The fit helps with recoil and accuracy. She has since bought herself a Snubby model 60. I gave her the FBI loads for it. 158 grain hollow point 38 specials. A Colt "New Agent" in 45 ACP, I like this carry gun. She shoots them all well, and carries everyday. I tend to think I cannot comb your hair or put your hat on to please you, I am sure I cannot pick out your pistol, except the carry pro it was a natural. I bought one for my daughter 5' 0" she also shot it well, she was very proud of her ability to shoot. I miss her. I kept a 45ACP version for myself. Tom Do not involve yourself in the affairs of dragons, remember you are crunchy and good with ketchup. _________________________________________ Lets see one in five Americans own guns, and only four million belong to the NRA? Something is wrong there. -------------------------------------------- The government wants to borrow money then give it to the people who screwed it up, and my grand kids have to pay it back? In the mean time my taxes are going up, and my income is going down? Sounds about right!

10-31-2009, 08:55 AM	#3
Old John Join Date: March 2 2005 Location: SW Indiana Posts: 210	My DSW has several........ And my DSW has picked out and bought each for herself. I just ask her which store she wants a "gift certificate" for. She has never bought any hand gun smaller than a 9mm. She has her own 12 gauges too. And, a CC-permit. Her D-O-Dad was a retired, career Marine. She could shoot just fine when I met her. 'Til Later, Old John Learn your Gun. Learn your Load. Shoot it & Shoot it Well. That's the best anyone can do. Live Deliberately!

10-31-2009, 12:06 PM	#4
lookingforthewayback Join Date: March 25 2009 Location: Panhandle of Florida Posts: 3,503	I learned a long time ago the majority of my taste is in my mouth. I quit trying to buy things for other people until they had an opportunity to try it themselves. A carry gun is very personal, if it doesn't fit or feel right it will stay home, if it hurts to shoot it won't get practiced with. In Maryland I had a dealer who has an indoor range and allows customers to try out many of the guns or gun types he has in stock. I will let anyone interested in buying a firearm try any I have to see if it is what they want. Tact: Making someone feel at home when you wish they were. "The liberties of a people never were, nor ever will be, secure, when the transactions of their rulers may be concealed from them." Patrick Henry Our enemies have trained our teachers and professors. Our teachers have trained our children. "The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. " Thomas Jefferson “If you love wealth more than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, depart from us in peace. We ask not your counsel nor your arms. Crouch down and lick the hand that feeds you. May your chains rest lightly upon you and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen.”—Samuel Adams Gary

10-31-2009, 01:37 PM	#5
Chuck Langenderfer Join Date: July 6 2006 Location: Montmorency Co, MI Posts: 514	Buy her whatever she picks out and hopefully has a chance to shoot. You dont buy her anything as a 'surprise'-guns that is. 22 Chuck

10-31-2009, 05:35 PM	#6
Popeye Join Date: July 12 2003 Location: Sacramento area, CA Posts: 63,104	Buying a gun for a woman is like buying shoes for a woman. Even if its "right", its "wrong"! The difference between a Socialist and a Communist is that the Socialist doesn't have all the guns yet.

11-01-2009, 06:16 PM	#8
threefeathers Join Date: November 17 2007 Location: AZ Posts: 592	I have learned never to preselect a firearm for a woman. I'm surprised all the time.

11-01-2009, 06:27 PM	#9
Nes Join Date: July 21 2001 Location: N. W. Okla Posts: 23,793	My Wife likes most all revolvers. She does like my Ruger 22 semi. Her favorites are a 38 special snub and her 617 with a long barrel. Proud American. Proud Okie NEVER FORGET All Fisherman Are Liars Except You And I And Sometimes I Wonder About You. ..............

11-01-2009, 06:34 PM	#10
Popeye Join Date: July 12 2003 Location: Sacramento area, CA Posts: 63,104	Leedi likes 1911s. The difference between a Socialist and a Communist is that the Socialist doesn't have all the guns yet.

11-01-2009, 10:04 PM	#11
Urzandowski Join Date: October 8 2005 Location: Southern Orygun Posts: 1,308	You have got to let her pick out the gun. I bought a revolver for my Wife. She likes revolvers. So over the course of several months I took her around to every gun shop/store in town, to let her see as many different makes and models of revolvers as possible. The number one thing about this process is that you have got to remember is to keep your mouth shut! Trust Me Just take note on which model got the best reaction each time. For my Wife it was the Ruger SP101, 357mag. w/a Hogue rubber grip. Popeye said... Buying a gun for a woman is like buying shoes for a woman. Even if its "right", its "wrong"! You Sir!, are abslouetly correct there! I got tha, "It's nice having my own gun, but its soooooo wrong" I think women are like that, but I'm still not sure.

11-03-2009, 03:01 PM	#12
Williamlayton Join Date: January 8 2005 Location: TEXAS, by GOD Posts: 865	HUMMMMM---depends on the day. Some days I would buy the Hen a .500 and the first round would be C-4. Most days I don't want her with a loaded gun. On the best of days I am playing golf. She gave me a gift cirtificate for my birthday---it was for a headstone and had to be used within 30 days. Blessings

11-03-2009, 10:53 PM	#13
gunfan Join Date: May 21 2002 Location: Vancouver, WA. Posts: 215	Shelley is a revolver woman. When I bought her the Titan pistol, I made a "lucky strike"... She LIKED it! This was a rare occasion! Scott

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